Social drinking is very much the norm these days. You see someone you haven’t seen in a while and “let’s grab a drink and catch up!” is the typical nicety (although it’s usually just mouth service). Nonetheless, many social events are centered around drinking. The idea is that having a drink allows people to relax, let loose a little and have a good time. But when does social drinking become an issue? When is it too much? And how can you continue to enjoy a vibrant social life if you choose that drinking isn’t what you want it to be based on?
I rarely drank in college because I was dead focused on my studies. When I did, it was very carefully and I rarely let myself get to the point of intoxication. I never understood why anyone “needed” it to have a good time and certainly didn’t understand how it was worth it when they would be all slumped over feeling like garbage the next day. After joining the rat race and being certain I was having a “quarter life crisis” at 23, I made a major life change and moved to Alaska for the summer of 2010. That summer would be a pivotal time in my life, for both better and worse.
In Alaska I began to drink socially and then it progressed into drinking in excess more nights of the week than I’d like to admit. I was given the nickname “Slurra” by the man who would several years later become my husband (PLOT TWIST!). I remember waking up one day and not being able to remember the last day I didn’t feel hungover. I would constantly challenge myself to take a day off, but had linked the identity of Slurra with being liked. I had been so brainwashed by an awful ex that no one could like me the way I was so I was excited that people liked hanging out with me, even if it wasn’t really me. People liked hanging with Slurra – who wouldn’t? She was wicked fun and always down for a good time. This was just the start to several years of a transient lifestyle where I hid behind this ridiculous persona. It followed me to Telluride Colorado where many people ONLY knew Slurra. When I left Telluride for good after about two years, I thought I left Slurra there to stay. I didn’t want to feel like I had to be someone else to be liked, but she haunted me.
I come off as outgoing and social most of the time. I like to smile at strangers and coo at babies waiting in line at Target, but have had few meaningful relationships in my life. I keep in gentle touch with a lot of people who I’ve had some passing connection with in my life, but I have very few people that I keep close to my heart. I get incredibly anxious when I have to go to a social event and the misleading idea that I’m not fun but Slurra IS can start to creep in. This is an idea that I still struggle with at times. Everyone else is able to have a few drinks while socializing so I should be able to too. Well guess what, I can’t. I’m not equipped with the proper “off” switch. For me, many times, it’s all or none. I don’t want just ONE beer; the carbs aren’t worth it to me! I’ll take a super dirty Tito’s vodka martini straight up. One SHOULD be enough because those are straight liquor, but one turns into two turns into Slurra. So now, one has turned into none.
I’ve been recently doing a lot of spiritual/intuitive work with the help of a counselor and in the process learning a lot about Slurra’s behaviors and why she seems so “fun” and uninhibited. When people drink their aura is impacted greatly. Your aura acts as a boundary, protecting you from all of the forces in the world that could potentially cause you harm or lead you astray. When you drink in excess, you experience the much more well-known physical changes such as lack of body control, lack of focus, slurring speech, blurred vision and such, but your aura also changes. It grows in size to contain all of the energy you’re creating and can even grow too big too quickly and “rip” leaving you super vulnerable to outside forces. It attracts more vexatious people that you wouldn’t normally associate with when sober and can put you in situations that can drain you of your energy and further weaken you aura. Toxic people who you’ve worked hard to disconnect from may pop up “randomly” and you may not have the wherewithal to keep the boundaries you worked so hard to create.
The impact drinking can have on you the next day is also more than physical. Sure, you may have the physical symptoms of being tired, having a headache or being sick to your stomach but as your body is healing your aura is also trying to repair itself. Healing your aura is much different than poppin’ a few aspirin and eating some greasy fries with a Gatorade. Many times isolation is helpful for repairing your aura because you’re keeping away from things that can further damage your spiritual progress.
The physical and spiritual repercussions from a hard night out just aren’t worth it for me anymore. I want to enjoy company in social settings as much as the next person, but now I’m very cognoscente of the impact it has on me spiritually. I’m working to grow spiritually and if drinking stifles that or sets me back, count me out. I’m finding new ways to maintain a social life (albeit a little more difficult being in a new town and having a 3 year old) but it’s not impossible. Hiking, a walk by the river, a movie night in with some homemade goodies are all good social alternatives to sitting at a bar and allowing Slurra to rear her ugly head.
I’m always up to hearing about other people’s experiences and ideas for social activities that don’t center around drinking so share if you feel inclined. Either way, cheers to growth and health however you choose to celebrate it!